The Things On The Sides Of Your Head? Yeah, Those Are Ears, Use Them

Listening. It is amazing to me how many people have no clue how to use this valuable skill. As life speeds by around us, how is that we have forgotten something as simple and relevant to happiness as slowing down, sitting on our own thoughts, and really paying attention to those around us? Too few people practice active listening.

Sure, they hear that someone is talking to them, but they don't give them their full attention. Students only half hear their teachers, shoppers going through check-out lines rarely acknowledge the cashier ringing them through, parents nod and grumble when their children are trying to tell them about something they are excited about, significant others talk over each other believing that communication is about being heard, completely ignoring the fact that someone has to be listening, and relationships are a two-way street. It saddens me to witness, and makes me question when and how we can ever find our way back to being a compassionate, interactive, and focused people.

What I have to say might be important to me, just as what someone else wants to convey may be to them. Out there, somewhere is a person who is longing for eye contact, a warm smile, and possibly a light bit of chit chat to make their work day a little more bearable. There are children craving their mother or father's undivided attention, friends who just need to talk, and spouses who are drifting apart with no understanding as to why. The solution to all of this is for us all to start practicing active listening. We all know how it feels to want that connection with another person, whether it is to share happy or sad news, and to feel as though the other person really heard and understood us.

So why are we becoming more and more disengaged? It isn't as though listening is an impossible task. In the grand scheme of life, how could giving someone a few minutes or even a couple of hours of your time, free from distractions, possibly result in negative things down the road? There is far too much self-absorption and far too little inclusion, and it has changed the dynamics of social function. We do not seek others for camaraderie, rather for our own personal audience. A society breeding narcissism is what we've become.

Look up from your phones, take out those earbuds, put down the game controllers and laptops, make eye contact and ask someone about their day. Practice being engaged and interested, and listen. Acknowledge cashiers, toll takers, and anyone who you encounter; connect with the people around you through legitimate, human contact instead of through technology. Be the start of crowd wave, because those always catch on.

Humanity is endangered, unless we work to change it, it will soon be extinct.