By some random chance, I turned on the TV this morning, and it was on Bloomberg. I NEVER watch this station. That changed in less than five minutes today. Aside from watching the ticker, there was a program that captivated my inner humanitarian. Haiti: Open for business? This documentary-style expose of a country that was nearly decimated by a massive earthquake over five years ago, prompted several veins of thought.
As a single mother, I've had more moments experiencing struggle than I like to admit; both with finances and mental stress. Even at the worst times, I couldn't fathom poverty; particularly the level of destitute poverty that is the reality for so many. There was never a point that I lost hope, or even saw myself and my sons in a more dire situation than we were experiencing. In short, no matter how tough times got, I was always aware they could be far worse. As a result, I developed a strong sense of gratitude for what we were, and are, fortunate to have. Not that my family and friends would have ever let us slip into the kind of bleak life that far too many wake up to each and every day. My blessings go well beyond material possessions; I would not be who I am, or have the outlook I do, without the support system that has long surrounded me.
Like it or not, it is easier to focus and digest the stories of poverty and hardship when it is occurring 1,822 miles away. It isn't that I'm unaware of the struggling masses right here in the United States, or my own backyard. It's harder to grapple with the imbalance of life when you can't just simply change the channel, and push it from your thoughts. It isn't as though I want to turn a blind eye; it's that allowing myself to be overcome with guilt, grief or hopelessness won't put me in the frame of mind to keep myself going, or help out wherever I can, when I can.
Realizing that even the progress and recuperation Haiti has made, it is almost mind-numbing that in five years the living conditions haven't improved more, and that the economy is still struggling. It's inspiring that there are foreign companies who understand the difference between working to survive and working to live, and have invested in the recovery and rebuilding of Haiti. But that inspiration leads to frustration that more isn't being done. In Haiti, and around the world. The immense imbalance between privilege and poverty is a global reality, wrought with nearly the same issues regardless of where in the world we focus.
One of my greatest struggles in becoming a more positively charged person has been resisting the pull of negativity this issue churns up. Just where is the line between being moved to act, and being riddled with guilt? No matter how much I do, it hardly seems to be enough. It is difficult not to allow guilt over having what I do to take over, and manipulate the way I experience life. Clearly, this is an ongoing inner battle that becomes more difficult when the evidence of such social imbalance is within our sphere of existence.
There is a degree of acceptance that each of us must own while maintaining an open mind and heart that is willing to give. That degree, however, fluctuates along with the capacity to balance enjoying the fruits of one's labor, while actively engaging in acts of external betterment. Betterment that does little more for the self than boosts the warm and fuzzies. While it is true that we are all born into circumstances that often steer our paths, we don't have to give up all navigational control. Of course, it isn't easy to change a life that is weighed down by poverty and lack of opportunity. It is even harder, I imagine, to forge on day after day when the results of those efforts bear little reward.
Certainly, there were circumstances that I was born into that could have, and likely did impact my life both for the good and for the bad. We are all born into a life not of our choosing, and certainly it impacts the paths we walk, and while we need to own our choices, as well as our effort, there are some hurdles that even the strongest of us need help getting over. There should be far less shaming, and far more giving, in my opinion. Each and every one of us will need some kind of help from someone in our lifetime, and it is likely in a way we wish we didn't. Why propagate feelings of inadequacy, as add-ons to handouts? There is a much better way to feel good about yourself; it's called possessing and acting with human decency. How much further will that dollar or donation go, how much more of a lasting impact will it have if it is done with compassion, instead of out of obligation, guilt or judgment? When a person is in the vulnerable position of need, they likely already feel shame, and consider themselves 'less than'; like they are somehow not a part of society. Doesn't it make more sense to offer assistance without the bitterness and negativity often tied to that dollar that's tossed into a can, or thrust into a person's palm? More negative emotions will only defeat the assistance offered.
My own acceptance is made up of the realization that I could give everything I have to the epidemic that is poverty, and it wouldn't be enough to lift even one person to an acceptable standard of living. Therefore, I have to find a way to appreciate my fortunate life without guilt or shame, and still do what I can to pay it forward. It is far better to spread goodwill and assistance with a positive, uplifted soul, then to do so out of the negativity of guilt. People are people, regardless of the circumstances that make up their life; while we should embrace and celebrate our differences, we should also be tearing down the walls that isolate, by remembering we are all part of the same human race, and treating others with value. Poverty and need aren't diseases, they are circumstance-based realities that require everyone's understanding and willing efforts to change.
"Be the change that you wish to see in the world." - Mahatma Gandi
