Nearing The End Of This Issue

Yesterday was the first day since the surgery that I was able to sit without gingerly adjusting my hind quarters to alleviate discomfort or pressure. Yay for the little things! It's been ages since the simple act of sitting has brought a smile to my face. Seventeen years, three months and eighteen days to be exact. Post childbirth has been the only other time that sitting comfortably took skilled maneuvering. In a few weeks, I'll forget all about the pain and frustration this whole hemorrhoidectomy has caused and I cannot wait for that to happen!

Despite the crappy nature of this procedure, I've managed to find the humor in it and that has helped the time pass a bit more quickly. When you have to shower off every time you shit, or bend over in a position that can only truly be achieved by a contortionist to inspect the damage, well, being able to find the funny is essential. The bonus is I've entertained a few people with my detailed accounts and that's almost worth the pain.

There was a day when I would have been horrified to tell anyone what I'd had done. Anything related to bodily function/dysfunction and parts deemed private was not up for discussion. After having children, there really isn't much that I would find embarrassing enough to keep it to myself. I mean, when you are laying on your back with your legs in the air, your wares bared to the room and you manage to shit at the same time you're pushing against a contraction, well, it doesn't leave much to be concerned about afterward. Modesty, as they say, is out the window.

As much as I share, there are things that I do keep to myself. This kind of thing just isn't one of them. Why suffer in silence when you can laugh about it openly? I had ass surgery, I've gotten more familiar with what my rectum looks like than I ever could have wanted to, and I have an appreciation for the exhausting effects of OCD, as I've been hyper-vigilant about genital cleanliness.

The more I heal the less I find to make light of, so these far too informative and revealing posts will soon turn to some other experience. Somehow I imagine they won't be quite as amusing, but who knows what life will put in my path tomorrow. It's time to go shit and shower...I know I'm going to chuckle every time I hear that phrase from now on.