Four Weeks And I Feel Better Than Ever, But There's A Big Exception

I find that I spend a fair amount of timing weighing things. I utilize the bathroom scale, only to mutter obscenities at it and this freaking elimination diet, as it is getting in the way of my fitness goals. The food scale in my kitchen gets a workout so that I can effectively assess the necessary caloric and macrobiotic intake I need to preserve lean muscle. And I mentally gauge the benefits and drawbacks of most every major choice I face, leaving me a bit exhausted on the daily. Damn it, where is the freedom of just going with the flow on all counts? I know I experienced this at some point years ago, though I hardly recall the peace and joy I vaguely remember experiencing.

Getting older is wrought with shit that no one ever wants to believe will visit them one day. In a million years, I would never have even considered that I'd strip my nutrition down to the absolute basics and embark on the painstaking (and mood challenging) journey of adding foods back in one at a time. I hadn't really understood that a diet absent of nearly all sugar and starch would leave me mourning parts of me that were once full and far more shapely. I was enjoying life at a certain weight and had absolutely no desire to shed any of it, as none of it was unwanted. By no means a lack of caloric or macro intake, I've come to realize that protein, fat and minimal, specific carbs aren't the only essential nutrients a body needs to thrive and maintain.

The thing is, I'm torn. I do not want to continue down this slope of unnecessary weight loss, but I don't want to dive headlong into digestive hell again either. Overall, the past four weeks have left me feeling good, like really good. Sure, I may have to completely back off the cardio altogether, but lifting has always been my preferred workout anyway. I may have to consider a slightly different approach to food reintroduction; one that allows for a bit more 'weighty' sustenance than strictly protein, healthy fat and select complex carbs. As much as I would love to just say "fuck it all" and gorge myself on decadent foods, the aftermath just isn't worth the momentary satisfaction of indulgence.

So here I sit, continuing on the path of weight assessment in almost every form. Hoping that the coming weeks result in options that reduce the almost obsessive search for that happy medium, and flip the scales to tip in the direction I'd like to see them head in. I'm all about the gains; muscle, weight and well-being. Without a doubt I am loving my new and improved abs, but well, hell, I'm starting to really miss my tits and ass.