I'm not exactly a private person, but I'm not an overly sharing one either. I tend to write out my thoughts, experiences and whatever might be going on in life as it happens, and tied to a lesson or realization. Unless it's something earthshattering, it isn't likely I'm going to shout about it from the windows, or even pick up the phone to tell someone. I mean, if I happen to be talking to someone and whatever the tidbit of info is, just so happens to be connected to or actively occurring, sure, I'll dish, but I don't go seeking an audience for most things in my daily life.
Like, last night I realized how much 70s music I still know the words to, but does anyone actually care about that? Guaranteed that if I had gotten a call from someone I knew at that moment, I would have totally brought it up. Otherwise, who cares, besides the blue-eyed guy who happened to be listening to the music with me?
The days get busy and so many little things occur that I don't share with anyone and often let slip from my mind altogether. The moments that define our lives aren't always the big things we feel compelled to share. Sometimes they are the in-between moments that make us smile, pull us in another direction or tie things together we might never have realized a connection between otherwise. Those things aren't often the topics we share with other people and it's okay to keep things for ourselves.
We don't always interact with those in our lives the way they might hope or have envisioned we would, but when it comes down to it, all of that noise is really just us putting our own expectations on others. We might express ourselves a particular way and just expect that that will be reciprocated, and when it isn't we find ourselves feeling left out, hurt or unimportant. More often than not that isn't even close to the truth. It would be wise to take a step back and really consider the person you're interacting with and how they relay bits of their life before taking it personally. Chances are, that person handles the output of their personal information the same in most, if not all of their relationships. If we are bummed or put out, it's likely because we are trying to hold someone to our own expectations of self, which just won't ever work the way we'd like.
The way, the time frame and the subject of whatever someone shares are relative to the person's proximity to you, the relevance it may have and whether they themselves even deem it a shareable nugget of information. I have had discussions with a friend about the poop of the day simply because something benign triggered the conversation, not because it was ground-breaking or life-changing news. There have been times that I've given someone more detail about the night I was raped than I've given others, simply because I felt compelled to talk about it at that very moment. I post about my sons and our interactions often, mainly because I figure someone else might see the humor in it. When I have something truly big to share, I do so, though the manner in which I choose to might not be how someone else would choose to.
I share what I share when I think to share it. There are things I divulge to some and not to all, and some things I share with everyone in no specific order. My life, even with each and every person I hold dear loving me, supporting me and allowing me to be a part of their lives, is still my life. I don't always assume people will want to know things, therefore, I do not always open the door to reveal the details of my day-to-day. It isn't an intentional withholding, it's just me living my life and going about it all trying to maintain balance while also trying to maintain connections with those around me.
The next time you feel as though you are out of the loop, try considering that the person who didn't share with you personally may not have thought their news was news, that you cared to know, or may not have even had time to think about discussing it with anyone else and may have even let it slip their mind. Just because you may have wanted to be in the know doesn't mean you always should or will be, and it more than likely is nothing personal.
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