Admitting you were wrong or didn't handle situations the way you should have is never easy, and when your apologies are to your child, they're painful. Of all the things I've set out to teach my sons, apologizing when I'm wrong has been one of the most difficult. No one enjoys admitting they were wrong, it's an ego thing. And whether they admit it or not, parents allow their egos to get far too interwoven in raising their children.
Ego is why we push our ideas and visions on our sons and daughters, why we attribute their characteristics, humor, physical features, and intelligence to the genes we passed down, and the reason we brag about their accomplishments as though they were our own. We call them mini-me, junior, daddy or mommy's big guy or princess, and deny them their own personality each and every time we do it. They are our children, but they are not us.
The same ego that convinces a parent that their genetics alone have created the awesome offspring they clap on the back when they are proud, is also what prevents them from setting the important example of owning their mistakes. Who wants to be wrong in their child's eyes? I think it's better to demonstrate humility and do so without being visibly reluctant, than to raise a child that has no idea how to make amends and mean it.
I fly off the handle and say things I shouldn't, I make decisions I wish I could undo, but I don't blame anyone or anything for my shortcomings. My sons know that I'm human, and I hope they aren't afraid to accept when their own flaws are in the spotlight when they wish they had stayed off stage. It's not the apology that's uncomfortable and awkward, it's that moment the curtain is pulled back and your ego is standing their embarrassed for being pigheaded.
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