It might be trivial, and it is definitely an ego issue, but there is no way I mistook what happened earlier tonight. Completely belittled by a seemingly innocent comment. Sure, I shouldn't allow it to take up residence in my head, but the shock took a while to wear off.
When I'm out in public socializing, I run into a number of people I know from nearly every possible walk of life. Should any of these people approach me, I am cordial and do my best to introduce them to whomever I am with. Tonight, for instance, I was having dinner with one of my closest friends and a man walked over to say hello. I only really know him through facebook, but we have a few mutual friends. I turned and introduced him by name to my friend; fairly routine protocol in social situations. There have been times when I don't always remember where I know someone from or what their name is, but I always try to dispel awkwardness and fess up to whichever I am guilty of...hopefully making light of the situation. The point is I always try to acknowledge a person by name and make introductions. Should the nature of how I know that person come up, I always go with the path of least confusion...in other words, if our history is sordid, I simply say 'friend' or something similar. And I absolutely never introduce someone by their state of health, relationship status or the like; there is more to a person then the gossip they inspire in emotionally immature people.
Given my own social etiquette, I was completely taken aback when I was introduced as my job title by someone I know. I mean someone I would have called a friend; someone I have a history with so there is no possible chance they could have forgotten my name. "This is who cut my hair"...that was it. Not my name, or the fact that we were friends...nothing. I mean, I completely get that there was no need to delve into the fact that we had actually dated, but to not even say something like 'this is my friend Tammy who also cut my hair' or something...anything else? Clearly there is nothing between us, despite what I thought, other than a professional/financial monthly transaction. Yes, at the moment my ego is bruised. Not because all prior history and relationship we had were completely erased by that one sentence, but because that one sentence was designed to strip me of any dignity. I became my job, nothing more.
About the only direction that conversation could have continued with me in it might have been if one of the other three people had asked where I worked, or had they been even slightly intuitive, what my name was. Awkward isn't the best word to describe that brief encounter, but it's the only thing I can say at the moment. I cannot imagine being so wrapped up in my own disappointment at how my relationship/friendship with another person had changed that I would ever intentionally hurt them. Even in the most uncomfortable run-ins I make sure to be respectful and exhibit social standards I am capable of rising to. I may not be a person's biggest fan, but I'm not an asshole who would demean them just to retaliate or prove a point. It's as much about not making the situation awkward for anyone involved as much as it is exercising self-respect.
It isn't necessary to explain the ins and outs of how you know the person you are introducing to others, and most of the time less detail is appreciated by all parties. Having the decency and character to at least use the person's name is necessary and shows maturity and the ability to navigate social situations responsibly. Being nice isn't that hard, after all.
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