Somedays It Just Doesn't Happen

When I have difficulties concentrating on writing, my first thought is often that I'm hitting a wall for topic ideas. More often than not I realize that I have too much going on in my head and narrowing my thoughts down enough to hone in on one thing just isn't going to happen. The thing about writing is if you sit still long enough, something eventually comes to you and you're off and running with it.

I wouldn't say that what I produce during those times that it's nearly impossible to fully focus is my best writing. I don't know that I would say it's my worst either. I'd love to be proud of everything I post, but the truth is that I occasionally hit 'Publish' and immediately have the urge to take it back. Like it or not, life isn't always the way we may have wanted and that includes the way we make use of the skills or talents we have.

In a perfect world, we would have all the necessary things that enable us to create whatever we create exceptionally well all the time. Of course, we aren't in a perfect world so much of what we do is flawed. Most of us are our own worst critics, but I freely own that some of my writing lacks oomph. Maybe it's the best way to feel great about my efforts when what fills the screen is rather good. Maybe it's just part of the process, I don't know. One thing I do know, however, is that those less than stellar days when I'm not in the right space to draft my typical prose I'm at least writing. Sometimes writing shit is the best way to flush out better ideas.

Most of what I share here are simply my thoughts, though I do it less like the diary-like entry I'm spilling here now. I am opinionated for sure, but much of what I write has some kind of experience behind it. No one knows the amazing whirlwind of parenting like a parent. I write what I know and what I'm curious about. The one thing I simultaneously know the most and least about is being a mother. The thing I wish I didn't know much about at times is surviving rape. Between these two topics, it's not surprising that these topics compose a fair amount of what I write. When you know something because you have first-hand experience, being passionate about it isn't hard.

Short of writing about these two topics endlessly, there are going to be days I just can't settle on any subject enough to write the way I want. I suppose it's good to find a way to be okay with that. At the very least, I've given myself a few points from which to aim higher the next time.