Sneakiness. One of my biggest pet peeves. I find it incredibly irritating when people are sneaky. It typically doesn't matter what about, except maybe when it is for positive gain where all parties are concerned (ie, a surprise party). Absolutely, without a doubt, hands down when it involves keeping things from someone else.
At no point should any of us be okay with hiding things from the people we care about. I have known far too many people who resort to sneaky behavior to continue doing whatever they may have agreed not to, or just plain shouldn't given the nature of their relationship with the other person. It's lying; plain and simple. Lying is reprehensible and makes things difficult when it comes to redemption.
The whole 'let's see how much I can get away with' attitude is beyond high school. This particular approach to sneakiness screams immaturity. It's also hard to extend any trust to someone who's motivating behavior is solely about pushing limits, and shows no concern for how their actions affect another person. Another act that is despicable is giving only part of a story. Intentional omission is underhanded, and the product of control and deceit. There is a big difference between 'I went to a party' and 'I went to a party and hung out with this guy/girl I use to date for the whole night'. The thing is, at least in a situation that involves two people who are romantically involved/committed, it doesn't necessarily matter if 'nothing' happened, when details are left out it automatically creates doubt and destroys trust.
In my opinion, deliberately hiding things like conversations, hook-ups, and even financial matters (depending on the level of commitment) from a significant other is the worst kind of sneaky. It is disrespectful and causes unforgettable hurt when the truth surfaces...and it always does. That one person can lie to one person, while leading on another says very little about that person's character. A good, caring, and honest soul would not forego honoring what someone means to them in favor of satisfying their own curiosity and urge.
I've seen the end result of all of these, and yes, even experienced them myself. Self-indulgent behavior is never justifiable with sneakiness and lies; it is the biggest reason social media has been labeled a drama machine and relationship wrecker. Far too many people claim they have trust issues, and while most often for good reason, they go too far toward the other end of the spectrum exercising constant suspicion and micro-managing of whomever they are involved with.
If a person cannot be open and honest about their actions, they either shouldn't entertain their whims, or they should reconsider their level of commitment to the relationship they are in. If you want out, get out. There is no having your cake and eating it too without consequences. Pretty soon the evidence will be on your hips for the world to see.
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