When You Do Things, Do Them Well

I haven't moved off my ass much at all today. Unlike those days where I binge watch some series on Netflix or lounge about feeling under the weather, today I was fully immersed in work. Over the past few weeks, my project workload has been on the light side, and while I did enjoy the reprieve from non-stop screen staring, it's great to be fully engaged again.

By far, being happy requires me also to be meeting my potential in all areas. Taking it easy every once in awhile is necessary to recharge, but for me, I need to be productive more than I need to rest. Maybe, at some nearly subconscious level, I crave being occupied with productive tasks because without focal points the noise in my head would go from a steady hum to unbearable volumes. For sanity sake, busy is best.

In large part, my self-confidence and self-worth come from doing my job well. Actually, from doing everything I do well. I am likely my worst critic, so skipping through a task, with a half-assed attitude and little effort just doesn't sit well. If I'm not learning, I'm clearly not working as hard as I ought to be.

I don't understand skating through life with the bare minimum approach to everything. Whether I'm cooking, cleaning, writing, attacking some home improvement project or working it is essential to my well-being that I am present and putting forth meaningful effort. On the occasions where I am just not able to muster the kind of energy and drive deserving of the task, I typically opt to do something else and come back when I can be in it. It isn't always ideal, and there are moments when I know I could have done better though I am contented to say these are rare.

It is quite possible that the area I find I could do better in most often is writing. Be it that I'm critical of my work or that I find that focus is the most challenging in this aspect of my life, my feeling is that I could often do more. When it comes to gauging my laziness writing is where I am most prone to slip up. The more aware I am, the less I attempt to make excuses, the greater the gains in discipline and dedication. At the moment just producing a few hundred words, a day in addition to working and chipping away at my book is a good place to be effort-wise. Rome, wasn't built in a day, after all.