It doesn't seem to matter how long it has been, writing about my past brings every emotion to the surface. Nearly everything makes me weepy, but in fairness today was a day full of emotional highs and lows. Even at my most balanced and at peace, I would have experienced the full effect of it all in much the same way.
A day full of disappointments and loss suffered by people I know, the air was heavy for the better part of the day. This evening brought another wave of emotion full of awe and amazement. To be able to travel the full spectrum of feeling in such a relatively short period can be more exhausting than a full-on crying jag. While I may have changed the pain and letdown that touched the lives of those I know, this kind of day served as an instant reminder of how many different emotions we are capable of feeling. What an incredible gift.
I'd never opt for unpleasant things to happen. At no point do I look forward to feeling the pain of losing someone, or the sadness that comes from being hurt or betrayed. I will always be grateful that those particular feelings exist because, without them, the best emotions would be lacking in nearly every way. Everything in life has an opposite. It's tough to watch someone go through what seems like more than their share of tough times, but again, balance isn't easy and it doesn't happen without pain.
Tomorrow is another day and the excitement is in not knowing what it brings. My hope is simply that I absorb every possible ounce of energy that reminds me I'm alive. Until then, it's time to process today and rest up for whatever may come my way in the morning.
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