You know that moment when you look at whatever task or path is in front of you, and you experience an almost overwhelming, gut-wrenching fear of how difficult it's going to be? Yeah, well there is no doubt hard work is going to be involved, but most of that is going to be maintaining the right mindset to push through. Once you start making strides toward whatever end you are working toward, the toughest part is keeping your focus and motivation. Our minds often trick us into thinking something is going to be harder than it actually will be when in reality it's changed that our mind is freaking out over, not the actual effort to get something done.
Few people can face something head-on with zero reservations. Most of us, despite being positive and motivated people will initially balk at something we haven't done before or something we think we don't want to do. I think it's almost knee-jerk because we are so stuck in a routine that anything outside of that creates a little feeling of imbalance. If we can just brave it long enough to see that imbalance as an opportunity for growth, we are one step closer to getting our heads in the right frame of mind.
Nothing that is worth anything is without effort. I hesitate to say that it's not easy because that is truly something each and every one of us interprets differently. Effort doesn't necessarily mean hard, but it does mean work. How we see that work directly effects how successful we will be in the end. If a person is lucky enough to have the stubborn tenacity that I know I have, the jump from being overwhelmed to productive mindset is aided by the sheer refusal to endure self-berating thoughts for hours because the choice to not do something won out. Indeed, my pig-headedness is why I end up pushing forward. I am a brutal self-critic who knows that expending effort now is better than lamenting later.
There were times when my insecurities and laziness won out, which is why I am so determined to avoid that inner-critic today. For me, the fastest way to self-loathing is to give up before I try. It takes a long time for my conscience to let go of those kinds of choices, which is why I almost always buck up and do whatever I may be procrastinating at the time.
I've been asked by people over the years how I do what I do — raising two kids alone, working multiple jobs, still being single, etc. I find this type of question almost ludicrous because for me the only thing worse than failing is never trying. My expectations of myself are high, so if my effort isn't deserving of success, it is by all accounts, harder to deal with than trying hard and failing. I'd rather fail because then, at least, I don't have to debate the level of effort I put in with that ball-busting, inner-critic of mine.
If you want something bad, enough you go for it. It is that simple. Sure, there might be hurdles and setbacks along the way, but those things are just the universe's way of challenging your resolve; making sure you want to succeed. I think there is a huge misinterpretation about over what is hard and what our minds perceive as fear and pass off to us as out of our reach. We tell ourselves we are dreamers or we don't have the right skill to do something we want to do. Each of those things may be true; we may have longed for something for years before having the opportunity to do it appear in front of us, and we may not have the faintest idea or even basic understanding of how to succeed. That doesn't mean we should bow out before ever even entering the room of 'what if.' If the worst thing that could happen from trying is I might have to start over at the beginning to have another go at it, what on earth am I waiting for?
I'd rather have the positive experience of having tried even if I didn't succeed, than always wonder if I could have done it because I never even attempted it. I see results in exercise not because I was blessed with good genes, but because I don't let myself make excuses. My sons and I have managed to live an incredibly wonderful, fortunate life, but not because I wallowed in fear and doubt about being a single mother. I refused to see any other option except making a livable life, and what I had to do at times to make that happen did require more effort and work than at other times. I may not have sold a book yet, but that doesn't mean I haven't pushed myself to keep writing and creating something every day.
Don't be your worst enemy when you could be the many reasons you succeed at whatever you do.
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