It's Not That The Suck Doesn't Suck, It's That I Won't Let It Win

When you've spent the better part of your 44 years on this earth being a reactionary individual, it isn't exactly easy reigning that sort of behavior in. What with all manner of emotion and the double standard applied to gender, as well as the type of emotion causing the reactionary moment, it's not hard to understand why this feat is so challenging. Most days I meet the challenge head-on and push back against old habits, succeeding in changing my outlook — if only just slightly.

Things rarely work out the way we envision, yet even knowing this we still allow the shock, anger, and disappointment of it all wash over us like a second skin. What gives? How is it that I can rationalize other people's behaviors but I can't keep from being overwhelmed — even for a moment by the crap that comes with undesirable outcomes? I suppose that the reaction comes more from the loss of what was hoped for than the actual disappointment itself. Still...it is hard not to question what my own role in the less than thrilling result may have been.

Of course, that just leads further into that room of negativity that I actively avoid at all costs. There is a fine line between acknowledging emotions like sadness or disappointment, and letting them take up residence in your head. I'm not trying to land my ass back in the mire of constant strife. Looking beyond those less than optimal outcomes is the only way to go. In order to make progress toward that end, however, you have to leave the bitterness, resentment, and self-pity behind.

Call it a setback, a dead end, a wrongdoing, in the end, the only thing that will make a difference is how dedicated you are to moving forward. That dedication only gets further from your reach the more you fixate on the negative yuck of the situation. If it takes 100 times to refocus your thoughts and energies to take that step in the right direction after getting tripped up, that's 100 moments you chose to be positive. Don't let the ugliness of wallowing rob you of your momentum and vibrant energy. Failure is all about learning, recommitting, and gaining new appreciation for all you have been blessed with. Embrace it and reap the benefits.