Well-intended Plans Are Just Hopeful Guesstimations

At the end of the day, no matter how crazy and disconnected the events that transpired may be, I made it through with the chance to see another day dawn.

Plan as I might, sometimes things just play out the way they do, with little input from me. I may find this aggravating, but when all is said and done, there is usually a greater purpose to how the hours unfold. The bitch of it is that I may have no idea what exactly those purposes are until much later down the road. The golden opportunity in that is that I learn things - valuable things, that I might well have skipped by had the grand scheme of life been revealed too soon.

There was a time when I was so quick to make a decision, that I would jump into something else without properly digesting what I had just been through. Good situations or bad, it is usually more beneficial to think about the things that happened before turning our attention to something new. We are better prepared to pace ourselves, and far more capable of understanding or making sense of whatever may come to pass. It's like taking a bite of a new food; you don't want to spit it back out before you actually taste it. There's no possible way to know if it is something you will like or something you won't want to eat again if you don't first allow yourself the experience of tasting it.

Can you imagine going through life with only snippets of interaction? Hearing the first part of a great joke only to miss the punchline, or anticipating the end of a fantastic story but never knowing just how it all tied together. The irritation of those minor things pales in comparison to always wondering how, why, and what if about your own existence. While we may not always enjoy the way something turns out, never knowing would haunt us until our own end.

Just because what I hope for, plan for or anticipate doesn't always happen the way I imagined, I'd never trade having lived through the events I have. I won't ever let the fear of the unknown put me in the position of ever having to wonder, either. There may not always be the kind of purpose and excitement in a relationship, job opportunity or adventure that I hope for, but that doesn't mean the time spent with a person, learning something new or trying something out of my comfort zone was without value.

I believe that everything I have done, each avenue I have tried and every person I have come to know has led to where I am, how I interact with the world around me and how I view life. I wouldn't trade any of it just to know all things went exactly as I envisioned they would before I ever traveled the path they led me down. After all, even shit is used in amazing ways.